As I was scrolling through Instastories last night, I stopped on this photo my church posted of someone worshiping.
My heart swelled and I teared up as I saw this person, lost in worship.
Then it hit me.
Dude. That’s me.
I’m not used to my blonde highlights or seeing myself from that angle. It’s weird to see a photo of yourself doing something so personal…
Side note, I worship with my eyes closed for the most part. I like to sit near the front and keep my eyes closed except for the occasional glance at the screen if I can’t remember the words. I don’t want to focus on my family who serve on the Worship Team or the cool stage lights (our lighting team is the best) or the people around me. I want to focus on God. I want to worship my creator with the voices of other believers all around me.
Anyway, seeing this photo took me off guard. After I realized it was me, My tears turned off and I became cynical. As I looked at it, the enemy entered in and I began to pick myself apart. My cheek is fuller than it used to me… I’m not sure I like the blonde in this lighting… my arm is so huge. Why am I pointing?
Then I told myself, NO. You are a child of God. You were lost in worship. And this photo made you cry before you realized it was you. Do not let the enemy tell you who you are.
I’ve thought about the photo since last night. And you know what? This is how I want to be known. This is how I want to be remembered. This is how I want to be found, no matter the circumstances—Worshiping my Savior without a single thought of anyone or anything around me. In the worst of times and in the best of times, I hope I’m always found worshiping.
It’s been a hard season. Hard is not even the right word. There is much to share, but now is not the right time. But even though things feel very low at the moment, my hope and my joy is found in Jesus, the sustainer of my soul.
Special shout out to my buddy Andrew Johnson @gingersnapmediaky for snapping this pic.